Wandering

My wandering mind, please give me silence.

Each event flickers host of other memories, events, happened years ago.

Please let me be! Stay now, and don’t wander far away.

My restless mind, please keep the moment now, before it flies far away.

Each image, an event recalled the load's guilt or sorrows. 

Time has no essence, flickers of moments present or way past.

My wandering mind, please give me silence. 

I hear the pleasant chirping of the birds, whispering sound of leaves flickering in the fresh,  moist air of the morning. 

I hear my heartbeat, steady and calm,

My moist breath mingling with the fresh morning air. 

The silence of my mind, resting slowly with the slow beating of my heart.

Sorry

My parents did not tell me anything about themselves or the family. They wrote: “Oh, everything is good and we are happy and well” I later found out they were not well, not everything was OK and my favorite aunt had died sometimes ago. I did the same thing to them. I never told them about my problems. We both lied to each other.

Was that OK? I wish I would have shared more of my life and they would have shared more of their life. I missed a great deal of life not knowing about them. I am sorry for not being closer to them; 8000 miles was too far to arrange a monthly trip while going to school.

Goodbye

The hardest thing about saying goodbye is leaving friends behind.

The time and space we shared, as brief and small as it was, was a home away from the place we all call home.

We saw and shared good and bad memories, people we knew,

Tools we used, space we called the office,

a cage, a prison, an empty space, devoid of the human soul.

How time, just a wink, passed between the hello and this goodbye.

We just met, but now I say goodbye.

The hardest emotion is to leave you behind.

Calm Waters

One step, tentative, searching, going in

feeling happy and then sad.

Where to and why?

One step closer, or further away;

don’t know!

Hoping my happiness shines my inner sadness.

Hoping my sadness tempers my confidence.

Slow, tentative, reaching closer to my wish,

wish not to be lost forever.

Things familiar, but longtime forgotten.

Forces shaped in the past, 
piercing my inner turbulence.

Yes, feeling happy now, but sad again!

Why?
When?

My inner desires searching for calm waters.

I search, tentative steps, hoping for inner peace.

Reality and Perception

Many years ago, I thought the following model for my perception of this world.

I thought the material sphere was the physical world, and my perception of its essence was just a reflection of the light (knowledge) bonded within the sphere. Some people think of two worlds, the physical world, and the metaphysical world. We are part of the material and physical world. It is beyond my ability to perceive and understand any aspects of the spiritual world, the region beyond the physical world.

As a physicist and humanist, my perception or even thinking of a metaphysical world is hopelessly futile. A follower of religious faith, do believe that only a divine revelation can penetrate the boundary (mirror wall).

Zoroastrian, the oldest monotheistic religion, plus Judaism, Christianity, and Islam regard as the essence of their belief in the divine revelation.

Those who believe in a metaphysical world have faith in an unfathomable entity. I envy them. I am hopelessly entrapped within a physical world. Can I measure the essence of a metaphysical entity?

My Inner Home

Silently in my inner home, 
the pounding of my heart, 
the chirping of a bird, the murmur of the wind whisking by my face,
pulling and pushing the thinned strands of my grey hair.

A symphony of sounds pierces my inner home, the sounds of cars, 
a high flying plane, and children playing in my neighbor’s yard. 
I am seeking to silence my inner voice, quiet and forgetful. 
My restless inner voice, recalling the remote past, the regrets, the mistakes, and many lost opportunities. 
I see their faces in my inner home, their laughs, their pain, and sacrifices. 
Sorry Mom, sorry Dad, I did not tell you I love you.